How Sweet the Landing

Posted on by Midwest Mark

Once upon a time, some dozen years ago, an email landed in my inbox at work.

Congratulations, it read. If you are reading this, you’re one of the lucky employees selected to give a presentation at our upcoming member symposium in September. 

I immediately flew into a panic. How could an email that started off so upbeat deliver such gut-wrenching news? My boss was acting like I’d won the lottery or something, but in my mind, the “lucky” employees were the ones who had not received such an email. The ones who didn’t have to stand in front of a crowd and speak. If you gave me a list of one million unpleasant tasks I had to complete, and Public Speaking was one of them, it would be the one millionth task scratched off my list.

Yeah. I hate it that much.

So, I immediately marched into my boss’s office and asked, in all sincerity, “Why do you hate me?”

His motive, it turned out, had nothing to do with a deep-seated desire to inflict torturous punishment upon me. It was actually the opposite: he was impressed enough with my work to give me a coveted speaking slot at the company’s biggest event of the year. But he was a fair man, and when he learned I was deathly afraid of public speaking, he gave me an out.

“If you don’t feel comfortable, Mark, you don’t have to do this,” he said. “I can assign it to somebody else.”

YES! YES! YESSS!!! I thought. THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME OFF THE HOOK!!! But, when I opened my mouth to speak, different words came out.

 “That’s okay,” I inexplicably said. “I’ll do it.”

Wait. WHAT?!?!

That was the first time in my professional career I ever ventured out of my comfort zone. I’m a writer, and as such, I prefer to toil away behind the scenes, letting my written words do the talking. Not my mouth.

Five months later, I stepped onto that stage, hoping my knees weren’t trembling too noticeably. It wasn’t a huge audience, just 25 people, but it might as well have been 1,000 souls filling a packed auditorium. And yet, once I began speaking, a funny thing happened: the words flowed. Not only that, but I actually cracked a few jokes with the audience. Who was this stranger that had taken over my body?, I wondered. Afterward, many in the audience thanked me for educating and entertaining them. My presentation on social media was a resounding success.

There’s a lesson to be learned here: do not open emails from your boss, ever. Plausible deniability and all that jazz.

Actually, no. The real lesson is that sometimes, stepping out of your comfort zone can be rewarding. Letting go of that safety net and taking the plunge is scary, like free-falling from an airplane before your parachute opens, but how sweet the landing when you touch down!

No, I did not become a professional public speaker after the conference was over. In fact, I have never done it again since. But I did become braver for the experience. I sometimes wonder, in fact, if I had taken my boss up on his offer to have someone else give the presentation – as every fiber in my body begged me to do – would I have been courageous enough to leave behind my job, my family, the place I’d called home for 20+ years, and set off on a new adventure in the Midwest? That wasn’t just stepping outside my comfort zone, it was launching myself full-throttle while blindfolded, all the while repeating to myself, No risk, no reward. And what do you know? It all worked out even better than I’d dared to dream.

So, when Vicki and Wynne invited me back for another chat on their podcast, I suggested we do something radical: throw out the script (yes, there is one, or at least an outline and copious notes) and just go for it. No format, no agenda, no questions in advance. Happily, they agreed, and we all stepped outside our comfort zones for 25(ish) minutes.

And what do you know? Out of my eight guest appearances, this one was my favorite. We ended up places where no script could have led us.

How sweet the landing indeed.

Isn’t this a great tease? Stay tuned for the “Out of Our Comfort Zone” podcast to go live tomorrow, 1/31 at 6am eastern.

24 thoughts on “How Sweet the Landing”

  2. I also share in discomfort over public speaking, so I appreciate the courage you had to do it. And what an amazing experience you had 🙂 Amazing for surprising yourself, along with a thankful audience. I’m looking forward to listening to the podcast episode of you guys leaping out of your comfort zones 🌞

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  6. Congrats on facing your fear, Mark. I went through my own terror of public speaking, decided I didn’t want to be defeated, listened to some great public speakers online, took every opportunity that came my way, and got past it. You are an excellent model for the great number of people who fear it.

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      1. Very nice of you to say that, Mark. The only way to become a good public speaker is to practice as much as you can and take it on before an audience as much as you can. I have also heard many good things about “Toast Masters.”

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  7. Good for you for saying yes. I share your fear of public speaking. When I was writing a weekly column about swim parenting for a swimming website, I got an email asking me to speak to a team’s parents in Sacramento, California. I said sure because my kids live an hour and a half away. I don’t know what possessed me, but it did get me out of my comfort zone. My son went with me, he sat in the back and spoke to him and survived.

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  8. This really gives me hope. Public speaking has always been a painful experience for me, though I can talk to anyone or a small group of a few people for hours on end, much to their dismay at times. When you blurted out ‘okay’ by accident, I get that and I probably would have done the same.

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  9. Way to stick the landing, Mark. (that’s my inner gymnast analyst voice coming out) I actually know nothing about gymnastics. 🤣

    Conquering any fear empowers us and makes us more willing to take chances in the future. I’ll bet you felt good about yourself after you decided to follow through with the public speaking.

    By the way, I’ve got exciting news. Speaking of awards, Publisher’s Clearinghouse just announced that I’m a finalist. Never mind that there over 200,000,000 other people with the same distinction. 😊

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  11. Pingback: Routines are made to be broken (sometimes). – Mark My Words

  12. Oh my goodness, that email is a classic! I would die if I ever received one of those emails. 😂😂😂

    But sounds like you turned it into a positive and discovered a new skill and passion, Mark.

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