In the eye of the beholder

Posted on by WritingfromtheheartwithBrian

The young man spent most of his free time at the firehouse. If he wasn’t at his warehouse job, the one that paid the bills, he was found most evenings at the firehouse. He was the youngest volunteer on the team, so most of his time was spent cleaning up after the rest of the volunteers and making sure the fire engine and equipment were ready to go at a moment’s notice. 

I interviewed him years ago for a story I was writing on efforts the fire company was doing to promote service in the community and increase volunteers. I found that he gave me an interesting look at courage. 

When I asked him if he was worried about going into a burning building, he explained that he took it seriously. Yes, he had a certain amount of thrill seeker in him, but his father and grandfather had both served as volunteers and he felt a duty to follow in their footsteps. 

He felt a duty to help his community. 

One word with a thousand different meanings 

We all have different versions of what it means to overcome fear and be courageous. For one person, courage represents the firefighter racing into a burning building to save a family’s house or a young Marine regularly training in the field, so that in the event of war or world crisis, he or she knows exactly what to do. For another person, courage could mean a mother, who advocates for her disabled son, working with teachers and social workers to get him the help he needs. 

I’ve long been convinced that one person’s crazy is another person’s courage and vice versa. The young firefighter reminded me of this fact. He mentioned that couldn’t imagine himself being a firefighter all of his life, he recognized that there might be a time when he couldn’t lug the heavy equipment like the job required, but he was glad he could help out. 

When I mentioned to him that I’ve long had a fear of fire and wasn’t sure I had what it takes to be a firefighter, we both laughed at “courageous challenges” that we could never imagine doing ourselves. We were in agreement that we couldn’t imagine cutting a person open to perform sophisticated surgery or working in dangerous jobs such as a longshore fisherman or logger, but people do it every day. 

One man’s loss is another man’s profit

The beauty of courage is that it depends on the person. Like many things in life, courage and beauty are in the eye of the beholder. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. 

The young firefighter mentioned that he didn’t think twice about putting on his flame resistant jacket and breathing apparatus and racing to fight a fire. At the same time though, she said couldn’t imagine working in a job where he had to put his deepest thoughts down on paper in a writer role. He questioned me for twenty minutes on my job as a reporter. He thought it sounded scary. 

He continued that he couldn’t imagine working in a job where he had to speak in public or work all day in a cubicle. To him, the jobs sounded frightening. 

Putting down our fear

In the end, I think the strength of our courage comes down to our ability to put aside our fears. If we believe in something, like the young firefighter believed in helping his community, then we’re able to go the extra mile. If we don’t understand the reasons for something, then maybe we’re less willing to put ourselves out there or in an unfamiliar spot. In the end, we all want to know “why’ and want our contribution to serve a purpose.

When have you last been courageous? What helped you put aside your fears? 

. . . . . .

Please join in on the discussion on the HoTM site. In addition, please visit my personal blog at www.writingfromtheheartwithbrian.comto read my companion piece. In addition, you can follow me on Instagram at @writingfromtheheartwithbrian.

All the best, Brian.

Images by Pexels.

40 thoughts on “In the eye of the beholder”

  1. Pingback: Two ways of looking at the same thing – Writing from the Heart with Brian

  2. I think the title of this post is perfect Brian. Everyone is going to define courage based on their own ideals and views and life observations. I think many of us tend to agree on the big things that we universally define as courageous. It’s the smaller stuff, maybe stuff even deemed inconsequential to some, that can and is defined as courageous to others. Everyone needs to be allowed to label courage in a way that has meaning to them.

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  3. Oh, I love this incredibly well-written post, Brian. Especially, “I’ve long been convinced that one person’s crazy is another person’s courage and vice versa.” Your conclusion that courage is learning to put aside our fears, whatever they may be, really resonates with me. Beautiful!

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    1. I worried this one meandered a bit, so I’m really glad to hear that it makes sense. You’ll find this funny. I initially had a couple of lines about mountain climbing being courageous because the guy talked a bit about it being something he would be too scared to do. I ended up taking it out, but thought of your experiences. Ha ha! It’s really hit me seeing everyone write about courage … how much it’s wrapped up in simply getting over our fears! If I can do that, anything is possible

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  4. Well, you got me thinking. I am also afraid of fires, so couldn’t share the young man’s crazy, but having said that, I remember, as a young woman looking out for my neighbours house, while they were away. One night, I heard a bang, and running next door, saw that my neighbour’s house was on fire. I ran in and saw three teenagers leaving out the back. I yelled for someone to call the 9-1-1 and set out on after the three. Later the policeman asked me what I thought I was going to do if I caught up to them – 3 against one. Years later, I would catch another young man breaking in to a neighbour’s house and I did catch him, pinning him to the ground until another neighbour and then the police arrived. I guess we’d call that courage adrenaline. Thanks for spurring the memories. (p.s. this was definitely crazy, lol)

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  6. Love all of this, Brian, and it made me think…long and hard…about vocational differences and the wacky ways we sometimes prioritize one career over another. Why, why, why? My uncle saved a woman from a burning house when he was a teenager and almost regretted doing so (not really) because of the attention he received as a ‘hero’. What a beautiful post about courage and differences. 🥰

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  7. Seinfeld joked, but it’s true, that many people say public speaking is their greatest fear; more than death. I joined Toastmasters in 2006 because while speaking publicly was not a crippling fear – it felt like I was disappointing myself when I didn’t share my ideas, thoughts and feelings because of a fear I felt I could overcome.
    I feel like fighting fires, walking tightropes, speaking publicly, doing surgery, operating potentially dangerous machines etc are all not skills that people are born with at all. Just like driving a car without fear or hesitation it’s a skill and familiarity that make us less fearful.
    Without practice and gradually built up confidence it makes sense to be afraid of water or climbing a ladder. Being able to speak gave me the opportunity to speak at my Mom’s funeral when over a hundred others were silent but they all had stories to tell. That’s the kind of regrets that I feel I had to avoid in life, and gifts I had to prepare to give.

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  9. I think public speaking is one of my greatest fears. I was courageous when I traveled to the Sacramento area on the invitation of a swim coach to speak to his team’s parents because of my swim parenting column. Of course, it doesn’t compare to fire fighting! What a good example of courage.

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  13. I love this post Brian and it’s a great reminder that everyone, as you said, has a different definition of courage.

    Firefighters do such lifesaving and important work and it’s not an easy job. Kudos to this individual and everyone in the profession.

    Did I read correctly these firefighters did their jobs on a voluntary basis? If so, that’s wild to me that the community has this model, as it’s such a crucial service!

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