The Heart of the Matter

To start the year off light, I wanted to do a list post. I think this beginning-of-the-year period always makes me a bit leery. Leery because my default is not, “I can’t wait to see what this year brings!!” Nope, I’m more like, “Oh God, what is this year going to bring?!” So, writing a cute little list post gives me a satisfying feeling of cozy comfort as I face all the uncertainty of 2024.

1. Pretty much any change in nature

I had a thought the other day, when I was thinking about my own imperfections. To be clear, about 95% of the time, I’m operating under the conscious assumption that I’m pretty perfect. I’m a Virgo after all, and we’re actually pretty perfect most of the time. But, every once in awhile, I’m hit with the realization that I might be slightly less than perfect. Recently, when this thought hit me, another thought quickly followed. And that thought was, “The only perfect thing is nature.” I know “nature” is kind of a broad term, and technically, human beings can fall under the category of nature. However, for the sake of this list, I’m talking about nature in terms of life science: rocks, oceans, weather, trees, flowers, and other such things.

I think I believe nature is perfect because it’s too overwhelming and scary for me to believe otherwise. And the longer I live, the more I just trust what Mother Nature does. She’s like, never wrong. Even when it seems she’s wrong, she’s right. In every given moment, she’s just restoring balance. Even if that restoration requires fatalities. So, when I see something like this funky rock, I just think, “That’s perfect. She knows what She’s doing,” and I don’t even question it.

Photo by Zoltan Tasi on Unsplash

2. Death

I think there’s a fine line between not wanting something to happen, and being afraid (or freaked out) by it. Of course, I don’t want anyone I love to die, and I feel pain from those in my life who have passed away. I’m also, currently, not looking forward to my death, but I trust that when my time comes, I will hopefully be a bit more prepared. I’m probably more freaked out by the way I might die, than by the idea of actually departing this planet.

I also think that death could fall under the category of nature as well. But I think this one is a bit different because with death often comes quite a bit of grief. And so perhaps I should say that grief does not freak me out. I actually think I’m quite good at handling it. I’ve been through a bit in my life, and I credit my grief-processing to a few things. One, my art. I don’t know where I’d be without my art to help me process my feelings of grief. Two, I don’t shy away from grief, but lean into it. The quicker you lean into it, the quicker you’ll be through all the gross parts. And three, I always dive into some kind of project when I’m in a grief period. After my mom died, I decided to read all the Harry Potter books. I didn’t even really want to, I just needed something to latch onto, to keep me steady. After my ex broke up with me, I wrote blog post after blog post about the entire situation.

I think death is one of the most fascinating changes in life, and I enjoy talking about it. I think talking about it makes me feel better about it. Then, it’s not this scary thing I need to be afraid of; but rather, it’s this inevitable thing that I just want to know more about.

3. Decay

Gosh, all of my items are kind of falling under the same sort of nature/life/death category, but oh well! When I’m talking about decay, I’m talking about rusty old objects, falling down buildings, and peeling paint. I love this kind of change process because it requires so much time. And with time comes history and wisdom. It’s a process that is unmatched by most. In my art, I’m quite drawn to notions of nostalgia, life, death, and the passage of time, so my okayness with decay makes perfect sense. Or, maybe I’m just macabre AF.

I think it’s fascinating to look at a wall, or an old home, or a well-worn object, and imagine what it looked and felt like when it was brand new. The hopeful innocence that is present at the beginning of something is soft and light in feel, but can also be bland and lacking in character. With time, everything changes, but not necessarily in a bad way. Sometimes old homes become lighter and brighter from years filled with love. And old objects become even more beautiful from decades of finger-printed smoothness.

I honestly can’t imagine how this wall was more beautiful in its earlier days than it is now. Can you?

Photo by Bekky Bekks on Unsplash

4. Getting older

Whelp, so much for keeping this post on the lighter side, ha! But that’s kinda my thing. I do like taking subjects that at first feel dark and heavy, and flipping them upside down to reveal their harmlessness. Not that death, destructive weather patterns, and peeling paint (lead poisoning!) are all harmless. But, perhaps they’re just not as terribly awful as we think they are.

Look folks, we’re all getting old. Why fight it? It’s kind of embarrassing when we try to fight it. We all have ways in which we try to deny our age, and we are all guilty of it, so there’s no judgement here. But, when I find myself getting caught up in the importance of youth, I just remind myself of French culture. I’m thinking specifically about beauty here, but I think this idea can be applied to all forms of aging struggles.

French culture in general leans into aging and doesn’t try to run from it. Now, to be fair, I do believe French women tend to take care of a lot of upkeep on the down low, so as to make us all THINK they’re just naturally fabulous. And I love them for that! However, most French women will talk about aging, and wrinkles, and imperfect bodies in terms of their naturalness. There’s a sexiness in the natural, and I like defaulting to this when I’m feeling like my neck looks turkey-like in texture.

PS for anyone who really actually wants to minimize wrinkles, I’ve recently discovered the magic of Vitamin D3 supplements. My doctor had me start taking them because I was deficient (who isn’t?). But I’ve noticed a difference in the texture of my face, and highly recommend this if you’re feeling really self-conscious. Even though, you’re gorgeous, darling!

“Vitamin D is understood to help with fine lines and wrinkles through its ability to work as an antioxidant. As you age, your telomeres (the part of human cells that affect how our cells age) shorten. Some research papers have reported that low vitamin D levels were associated with shorter telomeres.”

Uncovering the Unexpected Anti-Aging Benefits of Vitamin D3

That’s all!

Okay, I admit, this is a strange sentiment to end on, but I tend to run out of steam at a certain point, and I’ve reached that point in my writing for the day. However, I hope you enjoyed the journey within this post, and as always, I would absolutely LOVE to hear your thoughts. What kind of changes freak you out? And what kind of changes make you feel as cool as a cuke?

Happy New Year! And 2024, please be gentle!

xo, Libby