Remembering my why

Posted on by WritingfromtheheartwithBrian
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.

A few weeks ago, I had a tough day.

I was looking forward to a quiet Saturday. We had gotten three to four inches of snow the day before, but the roads were generally cleared and I needed to run a couple of errands. I was slow getting started, but I was able to get out the door and was able to check a few things off my list.

Before continuing onto the next errand, I stopped at the drive-through to get myself a pick-me-up coffee. After I had my coffee, I hit the button for my driver’s side car window to return to its original position, but nothing happened. I hit it again, but still nothing.

Grrrrr, what else can go wrong?

I wouldn’t have minded the open air if it was the summer, but with the temperature in the low 20s (Fahrenheit), I wasn’t so happy. The wind rushed into the car like a tidal wave freezing my face. Fortunately, I was ten miles from home and only a few passersby noticed the crazy driver with his window down in the middle of the coldest part of the winter.

I pulled into our driveway and immediately Googled how to fix the window. Of course, most of the possible solutions were above my knowledge and pay grade. Damn it, why didn’t I pay more attention as a kid when I had to help my dad work on the car?

I didn’t like the idea of snow and rain getting in the open window and I figured it might be a day or so until I could get the car seen by a mechanic, so I plotted my next move. Of course, our garage was packed with lawn tools, boxes of Christmas decorations, and everything else except the car. My wife was surprised to see me home so quickly, but together we worked to make room in the crowded garage. 

“Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids“

When the car was finally taken care of, I was annoyed to say the least. My first day off in weeks and I had to worry about a stupid window. I’m not a macho, fist-through-the-drywall kind of guy or anything like that, but I was ready to throw something against the wall. 

I felt like the rabbit in the Trix cereal commercials. Remember him. For the uninitiated, Trix cereal, an American brand of breakfast cereal consisting of sugary, fruit-flavored, ground corn pieces, has regularly run a commercial since the 1970s where a crazy cartoon rabbit gets its hands on a box of Trix, but is reminded that the cereal is for kids. 

I finally had a day off, but I wasn’t going to be able to use it the way I wanted. You silly rabbit, Trix are for kids. Grrrr. 

What really matters!

I was stewing over how my day had gone down hill when I looked in our family room and was stopped in my tracks. A couple of years ago, my wife plastered the wall with photos and black frames — each of them eight by eight — of our small family and friends. There are about 38 photos in total and they’re full of smiles and memories of happy times — birthdays, graduations, beach vacations, and other events. There’s even a few shots of Nittany, our 14-year-old Llasa Apso-Bichon Frise dog.

In the center of the arrangement is a sign that says: “Together we make a family.”

Oh, I was still annoyed, but I took a long look at the wall and took a deep breath. So, I needed to rethink my plans for the day and would need to be more flexible. I would have to change things around, but maybe that was okay. The photos reminded me what’s important in my life, my family.

Photo by Delcho Dichev on Pexels.

The least of my worries!

In addition, the pictures reminded me of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s poem “The Rainy Day,” which states: “Into each life some rain must fall.” Yes, I was going to have to figure out how to get the car fixed, and I was going to have to rethink a few things, but if that’s the biggest problem I was going to face that weekend, then in the grand scheme of things, I was leading a charmed life.

My “why” — simply put, my family — helps remind me what’s important in life. They encourage me to get up and try again. Finally, they help me laugh at my silly self. In this instance, I was reminded how strange I must have looked driving down the road.

Oh, yes, flexibility is a good thing. We’re writing this month on the Heart of the Matter on the importance of flexibility in our lives. How does flexibility play out in your life?

. . . . . 

Please join in on the discussion on the HoTM site. In addition, please visit my personal blog at www.writingfromtheheartwithbrian.com to read my companion piece. In addition, you can follow me on Instagram at @writingfromtheheartwithbrian.

All the best, Brian.

Images by Pexels.

44 thoughts on “Remembering my why”

  1. Pingback: Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids! – Writing from the Heart with Brian

  3. The trick is to be able to roll with the various “gut punches” that life can dish out/ without getting stuck in it. My grandpa had the perspective that I’ve tried to keep. (he’d dealt with grandma getting breast cancer, living dirt poor through the Great Depression, and a host of other heartaches)…when the tests would come, he’d be thankful, that it was “something outside” and not in the house (ie. loved one dying of cancer) Life tests can be so varied. (I walked outside yesterday and found out I’d lost both of my bee hives (about an $800 hit/ factoring in I was going to be splitting them in May, plus the rabbits had girdled two of my three Wolf River 4 year old apple trees)/ (the snow had gotten higher than the trunk protective stuff I had in place to prevent that from happening/ so between those two events I figured I had a $1000 hit….won’t deny I wasn’t disgusted, but I was so aware of the fact my attitude was being tested…. Yep, life is definitely a ride,. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tXh_MfrMe0

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      2. When I saw those trees, it felt like someone punched me in the gut. (I do have rabbit protection around them) but since I don’t go out there very often during the winter, I didn’t realize how deep the snow drifts were. The hives, especially one of them is a mystery. This is my 5th or 6th year with bees, and this took me by complete surprise. (they still had plenty of honey so it wasn’t like they starved to death.) Plus the #1 killer of honey bees (IMHO) is mites…I did the mite control in the fall, so who knows.

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    2. Oh Doug, I’m so sorry to hear of your recent news. But you’re so right, it’s important to roll with the challenges. It is amazing how some folks have the wherewithal to deal with huge problems like your grandparents did. Cancer is such a huge challenge. The fear of waiting on tests. Overcoming the Great Depression. My problem – a stupid window – are so small compared to that. Thanks for stopping by. Love the context!!! Hang in there with your bees. So sad.

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      1. I love the perspectives on life I can sometimes pick up from the elderly….not all elderly mind you, but the ones who seem to know how to deal with stuff w/o getting “stuck”. Yea, that song link popped into my head as I was leaving a comment.

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    1. You’re so right. I just need to remind myself of that. I mentioned in another comment that I have an another related piece coming on my site on some of the work-related choices I’ve made over the years. Those choices were definitely hard. I knew I was taking some hits by leaving early or whatever. I had to remind myself that it was more important to be with my family, the value was higher. Thanks for stopping by.

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  5. Oh geez, I can relate to this so well. It seems to happen when I’m particularly busy. And then I face the same feeling you describe so well – absolute disgust that this is how I’m going to have to spend some time.

    Your beautiful description of regrounding in the why is brilliant. Right! The rest is just life. But for what it’s worth, I’m sorry about the window.

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    1. Oh, you have it even tougher Wynne. I don’t have to change on the fly with kids in tow!!! At least not anymore. You get me thinking of another story. I’m trying to give my wife some me-time. I take all three kids to the park, they’re all very young. We’re going to play games and hang out. Whole day planned. We get to the park. We’re just out of the car, I throw the wiffle ball in the air, swing the bat. I’m just trying to get to the field. Smack. Ball hits my son right in the face, blood everywhere, tears. Okay, no park day today. Me trying to figure out what to do next. “Hey guys, let’s go get ice cream.” Life is crazy.

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  6. Wowza…that was one well-written description of window and frosty-cold mayhem! I can imagine the frenzy in the hurry-up garage clean out. Thank you for sharing how you turned all of that angst around. Family wins…yay! 😉

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      2. The window was fixed easily enough though. Annoying and more $$ than I wanted to spend, but life could be much worse. My mother likes to remind me that when she was a young girl, she didn’t get presents for Christmas, she would get a pencil and an orange. We like to tease her, but there’s a lot of wisdom in her words. Appreciate what you have.

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  7. I think we’ve all been in that position, so deeply disappointed that things didn’t work out the way we had hoped. There’s soc much power in stepping back and looking at the big figure, as you did, Brian. Thanks for sharing such a great reminder!

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  9. Yes, stuff happens and I love how your family matters so much to you, it put the window in perspective. What is up with those windows not working? It’s happened several times to us and to our daughter. I worried about her car since she lives in the Bay Area and cars are broken into and stolen. She doesn’t have an option for parking in a garage.

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    1. I thought it was going to be a fuse or the power switch, but it was something else. Of course, it cost $$$. More than I wanted to spend. Yes, very frustrating. And even though we were at our house, I hated the idea of leaving the car out with just plastic covering the window. Just asking for trouble. Ugh. Family, right! The things that are important, right. I keep telling myself that. Ha, ha.

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  12. Good story with an excellent lesson, Brian. I had a flashback to driving home from school one day. My son attended 6th grade at the same school, so I typically gave him a ride home. We get on the highway and it starts raining cats and dogs—the type where the semis are tossing up a sheet of water. As we’re cruising along at 55, the wipers suddenly quit working, and I literally couldn’t see. Luckily, I pulled over on the shoulder without getting into an accident. We sat there for ten minutes and it showed no sign of letting up. He had to get to basketball practice, and we were only a 1/2 mile from the exit. I rolled my window down, stuck my head out the window in the pouring rain, while still driving, and navigated my way there. Not sure if I taught him the old man was losing it, or if there’s always an alternative. 🤣

    A couple days later when I brought the pickup in, I learned rats had chewed on the wires, creating a short.

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  14. Bad days can open new ways. Your story is a good exemple.
    When we go back to what matters most, we realized that many things are just little rocks on the way. We’ll have to deal with them at some stage but we can keep enjoying life in the meantime!
    Precious reminder anyway!

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  15. Brian, I think I have thought the same thing a million times over sense both of my parents are now deceased – ” Damn it, why didn’t I pay more attention as a kid when I had to help my dad work on the car?” My parents could fix anything!

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  16. Well said. I’d guess we all lose track of our “why” from time-to-time. I remember being told at a young age that if I could figure out my “why” I’d be able to know “how” to do things. Also, love the Trix rabbit. He and Tony the Tiger made breakfast cereal fun.

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  18. My vehicle has come under EMP attack and now has no turn signals, so I must drive with my window down all winter long. It also took out my interior fans and created a huge parasitic battery leak, so I do that without benefit of a heater, and must lift its hood twice every single time I stop to first disconnect and then reconnect the battery. Because my attacker has access to a master key for the make I also must lock and unlock padlocks all around the van. I’m sharing to make you feel better about your window experience!

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