A puzzling problem

Posted on by WritingfromtheheartwithBrian

I’m amazed by the way my wife’s brain works. She’ll set out a challenging jigsaw puzzle and she sees things that I could never see in a million years. She sees color and shape patterns. She’ll see a small glint of gray and knows without hesitation that it goes with a dark blue piece off to the side. She seems to instinctually know which pieces go together and which don’t. She’s like a chess grandmaster seeing the entire board play out eleven or twelve steps ahead of anyone else.

Before I know it, she’ll have half of the puzzle together and then there’s me, twenty minutes in and still getting comfortable in my seat. She’s a savant, while I have to rigidly test each piece out to see if I have a match.

The play-by-play in my head goes something like this: “Nope, that piece doesn’t work, try something else Brian. Oh, cool, that one works, time to do my happy dance” and back to testing twenty million other pieces until I hit pay dirt again. My process is tedious and boring and takes double the time. 

We’re like two people hitting the casino. I head to the slot machines and robotically pull the lever down, wishing upon a star. She’s like a smooth-talking Danny Ocean of Ocean’s Eleven fame, playing roulette or poker where the fix is in her favor. She’s going to win. Everyone and their mother knows it. 

A real world example 

She pulled out a puzzle recently and seeing her in action reminded me of how I leveraged the same foresight and ability to solve a serious work issue a number of years ago. My team was helping to implement a large-scale technical transformation that was going to increase productivity, efficiency, and cut down on rework, but we weren’t getting a lot of buy-in from a key department within the company. 

Whenever we met with the leader of the team, she talked a good game, expressed how much her team was looking forward to the change, but she continued to miss meetings and failed to give the project the priority that it demanded. 

I had broached the issue several times, but we kept getting the same results, a lack of participation and involvement. After seeing the problem happen again, I took a page out of my wife’s puzzle approach. 

Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes

I thought about things from the other department’s point of view, what they faced, how they went about their job, and the deadlines they had to meet. I took the quote from Harper Lee, the author or “To Kill a Mockingbird,” to heart. “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view . . . until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it.”

We’re writing this month On the Heart of the Matter on problem-solving. When I couldn’t fix the change problem, I went back to the other team and rather than talking about my project, I listened to the challenges the leader and her team faced on a regular basis. I got a better handle on their job and why they were so busy. 

Once I could see things from the team’s viewpoint, I was better able to sell the change benefits and get their buy-in and help them carve out the time we needed. In the end, I’ve found that when I’ve practiced empathy and consideration of others, the puzzle in front of me became crisper and clearer. In reality, the situation ended up solving itself. I had earned their trust and confidence.

How has problem-solving helped you in your life? 

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Please join in on the discussion on the HoTM site. In addition, please visit my personal blog at www.writingfromtheheartwithbrian.com to read my companion piece. In addition, you can follow me on Instagram at @writingfromtheheartwithbrian.

All the best, Brian.

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28 thoughts on “A puzzling problem”

  1. Pingback: Cool under pressure – Writing from the Heart with Brian
  2. Pingback: Cool under pressure – Writing from the Heart with Brian

  4. I am like your wife with the puzzles, seeing patterns, nuances, remembering where I saw a piece that might fit pork,yet I cannot follow a simple map or find my way somewhere easily. Not of the people in my life are the opposite and so over time, we’ve learned to accept each other’s approach to things, accepting that what is easy for one person may not be easy for another, not for lack of trying on either side. All about understanding and acceptance without judgment

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  7. Oh, this is so good, Brian! Taking a sheet from Kath’s playbook to see things differently – and then let problems solve themselves. Such great writing and fantastic problem solving!

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  8. Beautiful post, Brian. It sounds like you saw that glint of gray and found a complementary way to move forward.

    I love that passage of wisdom from Harper Lee. Empathy is an effective way to manage change through challenging times and competing priorities. Well done!

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  9. Seeing something from someone else’s point of view is such an excellent trait. Even if you don’t agree with the other person’s ideas, acute listening will show your colleague you value his/her opinion.

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  12. This quote was a simple and good reminder to me today – “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view . . . until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it.” Right on!

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  14. I’ve always admired people with brains like your wife’s.
    I’m like you. Takes me a while but I end up solving the puzzle. Whether a game or real life situations, I pause, assess, shift pieces and then I ask questions too.
    Lovely piece on problem solving. Thank you

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  15. I am currently working on how to put a puzzle together with my students – I often see their struggle with making the pieces fit – i tell them to slow down look at the pieces see their color look at the edges. I encourage them to try it . Be patient and focus and sometimes you can be surprised the piece fits! Thanks for the compliment my love! Puzzles- my superpower!

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