The Heart of the Matter

I’ve been sharing a lot lately about hitting a wall creatively, because I’m in one of those uncomfortable places that all creative people reach at some point. I’ve actually reached this point many, many times in my creative career. This experience feels similar to wandering through desolate prairie lands (not that I’ve ever wandered through desolate prairie lands, but I can imagine) and finally reaching a lonely outpost, only to find that this outpost offers no real direction. At some point, one just has to decide whether to go back from whence they came, or pick a direction and move forward without any clear answers. As I’ve been dancing in front of this creative wall for several months now, I’ve been coming up with all kinds of ways to do things differently this time, because my default has always been to pack up shop, jump ship, and quit my practice, only to return again after several months of tortured guilt, uncertainty, and restlessness. But no, not this time. This time, I’m going to pick a direction and see what happens. I believe only good can come from this. But wow, it’s tough, and these bleak Lonesome Dove vibes are no joke!

Photo by Thomas Kelley on Unsplash

When In Doubt

I think it’s important not to panic when one hits this kind of a spot, creatively speaking. When we are in the flow and things are on fire with life, inspired, and beautiful, it can feel really jarring to have this energy suddenly dry up, freeze, and or seemingly evaporate into thin air. But when this happens, it’s best to stay calm, and to know that this is totally normal.

One thing that I’ve been doing lately that has really helped me to resist the panic and tempt of creative ship-jumping, is to slow things down a bit. I talk more about this topic and other creative process issues on my new podcast, Art Talk with Libby Saylor. This technique is great in order to keep the panic at bay, and it’s useful once we’ve summoned the courage to depart from our “safe” outpost to hit the open road once again. However, at some point, that outpost is going to get smaller and smaller against the horizon line behind us, and we need to come up with some kind of concrete game plan to tide us over until we reach the next oasis.

Do What You Know

I’m not yet bored of the abundance of Lonesome Dove metaphors in this post, are you?

It can get really freaky when we hit a creative wall, and doubt is always hiding in the bushes somewhere, ready to pounce into our path and fight to the death. Doubt is a tricky thing because when we let it take hold of us, it can really rock our confidence. We start to wonder if we will ever make anything “good” ever again, and we second-guess our abilities when it comes to navigating such treacherous terrain. However, I have just the solution! I know because I tried this out just the other day, and it brought me a moment of calm in an otherwise anxiety-ridden state.

There’s no need to reinvent the wheel or forge a new path when you’re lost, fatigued, and just trying to survive. Instead, it’s okay during these fragile times to just do what you know. Go back to the basics, to the stuff you know you’re good at, and to the stuff that you love doing. The rest will figure itself out later. We can’t be worried about greatness during this time. Instead, we should just be focusing on simplicity, staying the course, taking care of ourselves, and finding realistic ways to keep on truckin’.

I’m a collage artist, but at my core, I’m a photographer. I received my BFA in Photography, and this medium is at the root of most of what I do creatively. Since I’ve been doing collage work (for years now), I find I do much more paper assemblage (aka collage) than I do actual photography. But last week I processed a role of film, and when the images came back to me, I became so inspired. I’m not saying it solved all of my walled-off creative woes, but it gave me a bit of a burst, and it opened up some new and inspiring channels. These images boosted my meager confidence, and reminded me that I still know how to make beautiful things. Even though I don’t yet know exactly where I’m going, I feel like this putting-one-foot-in-front-of-the-other method is working. I intend to shoot more images this weekend since this is my bread and butter work. What I will do with them as far as my collage work goes is not my concern right now, and that’s okay.

Isn’t she a beaut?

Untitled, color photograph © Libby Saylor

I don’t exactly have a happy ending segment to share yet since I’m literally in the middle of this journey, and sharing as I go. But I love putting these open-ended ideas out into the world, because I often find that so many of us are in similar places, without many answers. In reality, the answers aren’t really the point, are they? I think it’s more about our attitude and demeanor in the midst of it all. I feel supported and empowered when I share about my fortitude in the face of confusion. And I feel good that I experienced a little light in a moment of darkness that has kept me forging ahead for at least another day. I know this all sounds a bit dramatic, but in a way it kind of is! Because it would be SO EASY to stop, and it’s a pretty big deal to proceed in the face of such uncertainty. You go girl!

I know many of you know what I’m talking about, and I’d love to hear your thoughts on this particular topic. Have you ever been lost in this way? And how did you feel after you left the pseudo comfort of your outpost? What tools helped you to keep going? And if you decided to stop, how did that go for you? I look forward to hearing from you, as always! xo Libby

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