Believe in Possibilities

Posted on by Victoria

I have a friend who makes me believe in possibilities.

I hadn’t thought of her in that way – ever – but after a three-hour catch up recently, I realized her friendship, our relationship (across 43 years, no less) is a like a tonic, and yet I’d never told her so.

As I drove to her house last week, I could feel my blood pressure dropping. I’d been in ‘mucho mode’…my morning routine where I speed round EVERYTHING as I try to tackle too much at once. I’m not proud of it, especially when I rationalize and tell myself it’s productivity, not self-imposed frenzy. At a certain point we repeat patterns because they more-or-less serve us well, and my morning games, reminiscent of the game show, Beat the Clock are like that. Except…

Once upon a time, I rebounded better. I could engage in my own microburst of can-do-it-tiveness and be no worse for wear. I’d take a moment to catch my breath and like an Olympic gymnast sticking the landing, hands reaching for the sky, I’d strike the pose. I’m good.  I’m good.

Now? I need a beat…or two…or twelve. Sometimes a sit down. Just the three of us  – me, myself and I – as I challenge the fray.

“What’s the rush? What are you trying to prove?“

 And of course, I always answer my own questions. Surly-like and rude:

“Because I can, stupid. Listen here…I can get more done by noon that anyone I know…”

And that’s when I stop. Yikes. I sound like someone I used to know. Named Sue. My mom. The whirling dervish my dad called a human tornado. His frequent plea to Sue? Just three words but said with maximum exasperation: “Slow Down Sue”. Sometimes she did. Sometimes she didn’t. Dozens of times she broke things. Sometimes toes. Her own…because she had a problem with going around corners too fast, catching her pinky toes on table legs and such. There are reasons why many who knew Sue drew comparisons to “I Love Lucy” antics. Hijinks all around.

I haven’t fallen into the trap of being so clumsy that I break a toe when I’m in full-tilt mode, but the other day as I carried a load of laundry down the stairs, I nearly missed a step. Whoa! Disaster averted, but barely. I took the hint to slow down and as I sat contemplating my nature, my robust round of go, go, go, my friend came to mind. Gifts and gratitude in one big rush.

This was my epiphany. My morsel of emerging awareness:

My friend’s presence slows me down.

We talk about family, aspirations, creative pursuits, and problem people in our lives. All the things that matter and we laugh our butts off, too.

When she greeted me the other day, I smiled and told her exactly what I was feeling. I stopped the moment I walked in the door. After the hugs and before we sat to have coffee I said,

“You know what I’ve never told you? When I’m on my way to see you, I swear my blood pressure drops. I slow down. I can feel it and it’s not JUST about being away from all the busy, busy in my life. It’s YOU.”

She makes me believe in possibilities, in purpose and the power of presence. My friend smiled and gave me another gift: “Right back at you“, she said. Regenerating the goodness. I believe in that, too.

Vicki 😊

P.S. Check out this link for more about my tale of resiliency in “Surviving Sue”. And here’s a peek at a favorite silly post about my mom, Sue. Readers love learning about her ‘big satchel’ of a purse.

34 thoughts on “Believe in Possibilities”

  1. What a wonderful friendship, you feel this from your friend, even without her saying it. This shows you that all possibilities are on the table, and there is no hurry to get there. To sit in calm peace with friend, without thinking of what you should be doing next or what you will be doing next, is a powerful gift.

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    1. Oh my goodness…whoa my goodness. You said that so beautifully, Beth. Picking up on the importance of the quiet moments – just being together. Thank you for that and I have no doubt you are exactly that sort of friend. xo! 🥰

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  3. For myself, “The Heart of the Matter” this week is the Supreme Court’s decision on presidential immunity and what I can do to save our Republic from what dissenting justices believe can turn present and future presidents into kings. I urge all your readers, Vicki, to take their own small part in saving our Republic.

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  4. I love how you describe your long friendship. A source of renewal where no words are even required but are totally welcomed. And I’m still giggling about this sentence, “Just the three of us  – me, myself and I – as I challenge the fray.”

    Oh, so good!! Thanks for spreading the love and belief this morning – it makes a difference!

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    1. Thanks for giggling with/at me, Wynne. Yup…those ‘three way’ convos are a lot some days. Appreciate you…my dear friend who’s in the category of ‘no words required’…more and more! 🥰

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  5. Oh those kind of friends are the absolute best. Helping us see the possibilities. Calming our worries during these crazy times. Encouraging us. Seeing the stuff we can’t see for ourselves. Ahh, the best. It’s amazing how much good that does for our bodies. Like a natural pick me up. Big Pharma would kill for a magic cure like that. Ha ha. 🤣 🤣🤣😎

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    1. True, true! Oh my. Crazy times…absolutely. And while friendship isn’t an antidote for everything, it goes a long way toward making me more functional…and gosh. That serves everyone around me. LOL! Thanks, Brian! 🥰

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  6. You are so fortunate. I have a friend like that. They are more than special. Unfortunately mine lives 3,000 miles away so I make due with some electronic connection and know a short text, sometimes only a smiling emoji, will get me back on course.

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  7. I, like Sue, failed many times to navigate around furniture or door frames, so I won’t zip around the house anymore without firm slippers that protect my toes. You’re very fortunate to have a forever friend with whom you have mutual feelings of connection. 🙂

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    1. Thank you so much, Nancy – you’re right. I’m a lucky girl in the friend department. But I’m sorry to hear you’ve tangled with furniture and door frames. I like your idea about solid slippers to give your toes a fighting chance! That would’ve helped Sue! Sending big hugs to you. 🥰

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  10. Two things…first thank you for your vulnerability , (it’s one of my favorite qualities about you, and secondly, I am glad you gave voice to your appreciation to your friend I would have been encouraged. Even Encouragers need encouragement.

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  11. Friendships such as yours are to be treasured, especially for its healing tonic qualities! I love getting lost in a long conversation such as the one you had. A sign of a great enduring friendship.

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  12. It’s such a blessing to have friends like that, who help us slow down, recognize possibility, and make us feel seen. Doubly so that you both feel the same! 🥰❤️ This is such a timely reminder to tell our friends how they make us feel. I’ll be seeing my bestie this weekend, and you can bet I’ll be telling her just how much she and her friendship mean to me.

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